Light🕊

It happened again! That weird sensation hijacked me as I emerged from my ultra freezing swim in Ballinskelligs bay. Frazzled thoughts, difficulty remembering details, disjointed, lonely but not alone. Not too long before fear too galloped headlong into the frightening mix. Mayhem in my mind. 

I know now had I the presence of mind to sit still, relax, close my eyes and let it all sail away, then our day might not have become the worrying saga it developed into. However, presence of mind was the one precious commodity I most definitely did not possess at that moment in time.

For the past twenty years I have struggled on and off with my sudden ‘weird feeling’ onslaught. Super scary every time but somehow I muddled through and when it would pass I would forge ahead once again. I never could articulate what it felt like to be in that scary space and so I gave up trying to make sense of it or describing it to others.

However, to my huge relief, today I received Docter O’Donovan’s welcome diagnosis; ‘Global temporary amnesia’. Fearsome but not life threatening. Phew!!

Rest and renewal required for a brief moment in time. Live in the moment! Running and racing can wait, a feeling of frailty lingers. My darling daughter-in-law Shona put it eloquently when she said: ‘You just need some time to get your head screwed back on’. I love that concept!

Beautiful sky this evening fills me with renewed hope. Perfect ending to our topsy turvy day. Thank you God for EVERYTHING.☀️Always light at the end of the tunnel.

Freezing water merely the catalyst. We hurt when someone throws salt at us only if we have sore places!🧐

‘Do not be afraid for I am with you, stop being anxious and watchful for I am your God. I give you strength, I bring you help. For I, your God am holding you by the right hand’.  (Isaiah 41:10)